SHE SAYS IT BETTER

As you are well aware, I basically read only fiction but claim I learn a lot of basic psychology from those books

Recently I wrote about favoring one child over another in your family depending on the circumstances. In reading the book “Lone Wolf” by Jodi Picoult, I was struck by how well one of the main characters spoke about her own feelings which parallels mine. Probably the same feelings that other parents feel about their own children, so I’m going to quote you a paragraph.

It’s not politically correct to say that you love one child more than you love your others. I love all my kids, period, and they’re all my favorites in different ways. But ask any parent who’s been through some kind of crisis surrounding a child---a health scare, an academic snarl, an emotional problem---and we will tell you the truth. When something upends the equilibrium---when one child needs you more than the others---that imbalance becomes a black hole. You may never admit it out loud, but the one you love most is the one who needs you more desperately than his siblings. What we really hope is that each child gets a turn. That we have deep enough reserves to be there for each of them, at different times.

Amen